Tuesday, July 31, 2012


Okay, I do not wish to write my opinion, but want to share few thoughts regarding this topic. Before I start off, understand that I am into BB mangas these days, so I gladly not only accept YunJae but also enjoy their tit bits.

I read few fan fictions before of Harry Potter –Hermione and Malfoy, but I never wished them to be together in actual series. Yes, it was just a stupid thought, thoughts that were shared by many.
 But, as I said, a lot of kpop is poison, no not for body or physically, for the heart, soul that might tear them apart. Well, am I being too dramatic? Then let me start from the DBSK thing. Everything is my point of view and none may be real.

Five boys then, now men, who stood together, why are they not together anymore? I would be glad if they disband, but no, there separated. How can an honest relation be broken just because of money or financial need? Was fame that important to Yunho or was singing that important to JYJ?

Either way, I accepted the not understanding Kpop into my life, only because of its music. What turns me on is the voice of Junsu, Jaejoong and Youchan. Let me remind you, no matter others say, Yunho is a rapper and Changmin is a good dancer. But ,if the main chorus of the group were and was always been JYJ, and for some reason if they got separated ,then I will only say, DBSK, one kpop band which entered the Geneses book of World Record, only for huge fandom, was broken down. I am sorry if your bias were into my not-so-good list, but let me remind you, this is my POV.

Where should I start, how should I start? You can’t expect me to just run on the roads of Hyderabad and shout” Oppa!! Chomal michasoyo!! Khajimayo!! Chaebal!! Please be together!!!”
Yes, it’s a typical fan girl’s ply. But, don’t want my oppas to suffer for so long in SME. Who knows, when 5 guys decided to disband, why the leader and the maknae didn’t leave the SME? Was it because CEO LSM showered HyoMin with gold or something? Whole world knows Yunho is financially unstable before his debut, But, nan chincha shairo,about Hero Jae and Yunho to be not together any more. I am more of YunJae fan than EunHae.

May be the boys have common understand and chose their paths.  I think  they do communicate with each other somehow in spite of SME warnings.
But, when the first concert of JYJ was held in Japan, tears were down my cheeks, till today when I watch their live performance, I still have moist eyes. After SME kicked JYJ, they literally had nowhere to go. None of Korean programs were airing these guys. The whole of Korea rejected them. No lead roles were given in dramas, no concerts.  Such hardship, so much of pain and break downs, Aah, nae mah eum sulpahe.
It wasn’t an easy path for HyoMin too. They need to carry the weight of DBSK 5 cut down to two and most of all; none can sing as good as those boys who left. There was constant flopped songs from HyoMin DBSK. There was a lot of mess. But, they slowly picked up.

But, what I am gung-geumhae ,is , what made HyoMin change their mind of not leaving the so called sweet hell-SME? Why can’t they just go and join JYJ? All right, they are mature enough to take their decisions and to set their priorities.

Moving with JYJ, yes, they had hard time. But, frankly I adore them .Why? Simple, they don’t sing others written songs .They write their own songs, edit and compose them. I adore originality more. May be because in my country, unlike Korea, is built where right amount of fame is taken by right people.

I like almost all songs of JYJ; they are good, original and sulphae. But, even when I don’t adore HyoMin, who are quite literally puppets of SME; there is something I always wanted-YunJae.

After the breakup of DBSK/JYJ, lot of fan fictions came up with undividable love.  What I liked, even before I started reading it was –Damaged.Yes, it’s a good fanfic. It starts exactly with JYJ/DBSK break up and ends with their reunion or YunJae making their relationship public. But, I was not pulled by this plot, it more focuses on how each men felt and where exactly was the difference in opinion was made .Although , it is not the real story, many believe it’s as close to as reality. I do not want JYJ to join SME. No, chincha shiro!

Also, I do not want DBSK to leave SME. Why? It’s not slave to Yunho anymore. They have their own importance and Changmin just follows Yunho everywhere. Idiotic Kid! May be, Yunho needed money very badly with fame, or SME blackmailed Yunho about something. Because, if it’s for money, then Jae should think about not leaving SME ,for he lives with eight sisters and two mothers( One bio and one not).

The fan fiction focuses on damaged relationship between YunJae, damaged DBSK, damaged friendship, damaged ambitions, damaged fan hearts and damaged souls. Yes, the fic was way too dramatic but somewhere, it touched me. Are my oppas thinking the same we all are thinking? Do they ever contact each other? Did they have a good talk before breakup? Are they really okay with what they are doing right now? Do they miss each other?

May be I relate this story to my real life. Wae? Khunya, I just left BIET, and when I moved to SICET, I took real long time to set. Again I stopped talking to people or colleagues. No, its not their fault. It just that, heart of my hearts I still was taking my self-Do I not deserve it? Where should and how should I improve? How can I move on? How should I prove myself? It was not until Pramod told me importance of SICET.A whole new place, where I can show a whole new myself where I can focus only on studies. 

Frankly, who wants to be lonely? When every staff sits in Room A, I alone sit in Room B. Even if they accompany me, I would be still lonely. I just prepare for my class and then I suck into my loneliness. I suddenly stopped talking to people. I hardly talk with any one anymore. May be BIET has taught me more than just subject knowledge. May be I am one of those idiots who feel a melon for a peanut problem. Who knows what my future holds. I always give Amulya lectures about facing and planning life. I often wonder if I am telling it for my sake to myself. Sempai waso kinchana. Eeroke.

Sure, I wanted a teaching career. Sure, it’s not a smooth path. Sure it pays me less. Sure, when I want to buy something, I need to think twice. Sure, I get less importance. Sure, I go nowhere in life. Khundaeyo, it is for time pass. It’s not the right thing. Working hard solves the entire problem that I promised to YunJaea, one promise that I do not wish to break.

What? Might you think nega michaso, khundaeyo, I have a contact name with –YunJae in my phone. When I am lonely or scared or do not know what to do or tell me something, I just text that person. After an affordable time of BSNL network, hand phone trings with  muncha wasayo. I read my own message and find toughness. Only thing is, I think it’s from Yunjae. I am very imaginative and hence I have no problem believing my own story.

Even when I am younger to them, I still address myself as their noona, and hence I find my way. Those who think I am mad; yes I am, about Yunjae. I do not see them as two. It’s just another character created in my mind’s eye like Rose, Clara, Humpray, Ryu Amakusa and Conon.

I didn’t do anything for them. But, when JYJ sings, it just blows my heart, I am so proud of them. Tomorrow, whom ever I meet in life, I will continue to support my oppas no matter what. Thank you for living (Don’t worry; none of them are dead. Just read Damaged for more details).

 Zattai Arigatho !! Kamsamidha kurigu Gumaptha. JYJ fighting! DBKS Aja Aja!! And YunJaeya- chigum noona nomu haembukhae.

Mood: Happy
Song: Fighting Bad Feelings,TMAX

About Me

My photo
Hyderabad, A.P., India